“It’s a grieving process.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard that in the past 2 years. And it is. And I’ve been through the same damn grieving process 800 times. And it sucks each time. But each time I secretly did have someone/thing to fall back on. And now I’m going through it again.
There is more I want to say. There is more I want to say. There is more I want to say that is probably not worth it.
I. Am. So. Hurt. Nauseated. Sick. Untrusting. I think of things and have to brush them away. I think of lots of things. And I have to brush them all away. Have to make myself forget them. Have to remember good things. Have to ignore that while it was good for me, it was like double-dipping for others. When I said it was uneven, I had no idea how spot on I was.
So unfair.
